Ballpark Security is Slow and Dumb - AT&T Park SF Giants

Here's a photo I took today of the line to get through security at AT&T Park.

They now have a new policy that if you want to bring in liquid beverages into the stadium, it must have the original manufacturers' seal on the bottle. What this means is that you cannot bring in any open bottles (say you are drinking some water while waiting in the long stupid line), and you can't bring in any more of those nice inexpensive ice cold coffee drinks from McDonald's and Starbucks.

Just how lame is security?
Let's see... in this photo, there are only FOUR people screening the main entrance gate at AT&T Park. And there's a huge line forming.

Just how STUPID is security?
In line, I noticed a lady had a half consumed open bottle of water in the bag. The security person would not let her through, and this guy behind me said "it's just water." I said to the guy "yeah, it's just water, you wonder why this policy is bullshit." Then I find later that a kid sneaked in a McDonald's drink, and was sitting about ten feet away from my row.

An anonymous poster in an article by the SF Examiner on the crackdown of teenage drinking at the ballpark states that:

• "I am a security guard for the San Francisco Giants... We definitely could use more staff. Most fans arrive 35 [minutes] before game time. We literally have about 20,000 fans entering per gate with roughly 6 under paid guards checking bags. I could never understand the politics behind this. The San Francisco Giants are ranked the second best customer service and internal shop scores in the MLB league. We are also one of the lowest paid security departments in the MLB. The Giants organizations are very irresponsible..."

The Giants claim in an e-mailed response that I questioned them about their unsealed drink policy:

• "The San Fancisco (YEAH... GREAT TYPO GIANTS REP. I work in a city called "Fancisco") Giants in cooperation with the City of San Francisco, and the San Francisco Police Department are attempting to mitigate underage consumption of alcoholic beverages in AT&T Park on Friday and Saturday nights. Most of the alcohol being smuggled into the ballpark from outside is vodka or grain alcohol in water bottles and rum in plastic Coca Cola bottles. Judging from last night's game and the huge amounts of alcohol we confiscated at the gates, and the large number of underage drinking citations given by undercover alcohol enforcement agents and SFPD inside and outside the ballpark, I believe our efforts were quite successful."

Just out of curiosity to the Giants/AT&T Park management, did you really confiscate "huge amounts of alcohol?" Or was it just simply a lot of unsealed bottles of soda, water, and juice?

Here's what I think:

1. Park management is trying to rake in more money from concessions. Now, you can't buy that meal that comes with a drink at McDonald's, you can't have your nice Starbucks coffee on that cold night at the park, and why don't you just sniff the bottle and determine IT AINT ALCOHOL!
2. The Giants management claims in an e-mail reply: "AT&T Park remains one of a minority of Major League ballparks that allow guests to bring in their own food and non-alcoholic beverages." Sorry, I don't believe you. All local Bay Area stadiums permit food and non-alcoholic drinks.
3. WTF is this? An airport with TSA agents? The park security used to just look in your bag, and if you don't have a gun, soda can, or a glass bottle, you just go through. They would usually just feel the bag for any glass or cans. And even then, they should just look in the bag for a few seconds and let you pass through. Now it takes like ten seconds. Multiply that by 20,000+ fans, and you'll be ticked.
   
4. It's just a great way to PISS OFF THE FANS. Just how much longer do we have to give up our basic rights to these ballpark assholes? So I have an open bottle, it's no problem, and let me in. What do I have to do, show my Alcoholics Anonymous completion certificate to prove I don't drink?
   
5. I don't have a glass bottle that I can use as a weapon, I don't have a can that can be used as a weapon (really?). Shit, then they'll claim that a plastic bottle can be used as a weapon. Let me melt it with a lighter and make a sharp edge. Somehow folks in prison can sharpen a plastic toothbrush handle into a shiv.
   

Drunk Lohan, now drunk NASA pilots...

As we all know, Lindsay Lohan was nailed for drunk driving and possessing some very ugly ass drugs, but the fun drunk news of the day comes from NASA, where some of our astronauts were advised to not fly because they drank before being launched out of space.

Makes me wonder, do they serve alcohol at the international space station?

Update: Lindsay Lohan claims innocence on the drug possession

Looks like someone put too much sugar into my morning coffee this morning... word from the entertainment program: Access Hollywood reports that recently rehabilitated from alcohol abuse, Ms. Lindsay Lohan claims innocence to the drug possession charges.

What an interesting story, good old drunk-o Lindsay Lohan, a woman who was carrying cocaine on her possession when checked for any contraband, gets caught by the cops. Haven't you ever heard of the term, "you have the right to remain silent?" How the hell are you going to deny the possession charge if you have the damn illegal narcotic in your pocket?

What is interesting to read is that she did not deny the DUI in the recent Access Hollywood interview for alcohol on her most recent arrest. So she must have been drunk when the cops were giving her the sobriety test.

Either way, she's screwed. Time for her to visit a nice jail or prison cell! I'm sure the ladies at the big house will give her the "special treatment" (with the shiv!).

Lindsay Lohan - Needs some jail time for DUI and Drugs

Just posted on the news this morning, Lindsay Lohan is arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol (misdemeanor DUI), driving with a suspended license, and possession of cocaine (felony) and transport of a narcotic (felony).

Plus, just to add insult to our morning coffee and cereal, she was just released recently from a rehab center after being in a six week detox program. She had to wear a tamper-proof ankle bracelet that constantly monitors her blood alcohol levels for alcohol, but it seems that device that is supposed to keep her sober, made her get buzzed and possibly "high" again. Now she's arrested with a blood alcohol level of .12 to .13 percent (legal limit is .08 percent).

Does it seem that Lindsay Lohan is becoming the next "Paris Hilton" to be sent to a jail for some real life treatment? But wait, there's more! If she gets convicted of a felony for the drugs, she would not go to a county jail (where she'd get the "special" treatment), she'd go to the overcrowded, awful, and orange jumpsuit world of the state prison system! You know, the place where Governor Arnold doesn't give an honest crap about you and you just have to eat stale hot dog buns with some mystery meat product on the side.

My suggestion, lets get her into a "scared straight" program where we send Lindsay to an infamous female or even a male prison. There, a trustee of the prison will give the ultimate tour of the facility, including giving a scary lecture about life behind bars, a tour of prison cells (which I don't think they are "model" rooms) and a good lecture about why you should not drop the soap in the damn shower.

Or how about we shove her into the Maury Povich show (not to do the paternity test) and bring in some ex-military sarges to bust her butt with good old-fashioned push-ups and scream at her until she cries; waaah waah wah!

Here's my point of view about this, how in the hell did this goody goody girl turn into a piece of turd? Did she get "the talk" by her parents and by her teachers about people who abuse alcohol and drugs? Remember the classic South Park "drugs are bad" episode when Mr. Mackey said "drugs are bad... m'kay?" I wonder what her private school taught this little stupid lady?

Lastly, whenever she does get her driving privileges back, I hope that the judge orders that all her vehicles has to be installed with a breathalyser to start the engine.

Let's summarize my rants:
Drugs are bad.
Alcohol is bad (especially for her!).
Driving with a suspended license? Can we create a lifetime ban?
Let her wear a sandwich board that says "this is my second DUI and I had drugs in possession, and I was and still am stupid" and she should stand at a very busy intersection from 9AM to 5PM for an entire week, including weekends.
Have a nice time in prison! Watch out for the shivs!