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Friday, March 5, 2010

Questions and Thoughts While Riding Muni

When riding Muni or just waiting for it, have you ever thought of these questions or said these statements?
  1. Why do passengers pull the "stop requested" cord while the metro train is in the subway?
  2. Also, why do passengers 'kick' the door handles on the metro train while it is in the subway and just arrived at a station?
  3. Do the emergency exit red handles on the windows actually work?
  4. When will Muni revise the mispronounced street names?
  5. Why do some people think the back doors automatically open when they don't read the sign that says "STEP DOWN TO OPEN DOORS?"
  6. Whose idea was it to make a shrill noise when someone touches the closing doors of a metro train?
  7. Can I actually fit into that metro seat that's next to the window and in front of the middle doors?
  8. If the fare box is not working and fare inspectors board the vehicle, what's next?
  9. Why did you pick your nose and eventually put your fingers on the pole?
  10. Is there a reason why someone has to clip their fingernails now, on the bus, when it can be done at home?
  11. I wonder what the lady next to me is talking about on the phone.
  12. Ding ding, "please exit through the rear doors." I GET IT! STOP TELLING ME THAT!
  13. I'm going to sneak a peek at that newspaper the guy is reading. Sale on shoes? I'm there!
  14. I don't need to be told every few minutes in three languages that the front seats are reserved for seniors and the disabled. Hell, I can lip sync every single Chinese word spoken.
  15. I wonder if I can get away with taking two transfers from the rubber band on the fare box when paying my fare.
  16. Hold the card steady dumbass while using that TransLink card.
  17. It's dark, I'm wearing a black jacket and dark pants. Should I wave my hand at the approaching bus I need?
  18. Shit, fare inspectors!
  19. If I lay a fart on the metro train and the air conditioner sucks that air in, will it spread to the rest of the train?
  20. If the station agent's booth says pay cash at other booth, why are the fare gates still allowing me to dump money into the box?
  21. Muni bio diesel... the bus passing by doesn't smell like french fries.
  22. Another delay? Where's my tax money going?
  23. 311 is telling me to call 511 to get bus arrival times and use the "stop ID #," so where the hell is the sticker telling me that?


Dan Berkes said...

#8 - I saw this happen about a week ago, the two fare inspectors on a crowded 8X with a broken farebox, and being rude even after people told them about it. One of them said "well, you shouldn't have boarded if you didn't have a transfer," to someone. They ended up doing that silly backing-down-but-not-admitting-defeat thing that cops and people who think they're cops do, because the crowd was turning into an angry mob.

#10 - I have often wondered what kind of social lives are led by the people who do this. They must be very busy and important.

To add:

What is it about the Muni experience that makes many of our, um, more uniquely-behaving locals go into manic mode about fifteen seconds before the bus arrives at their stop and start banging on the back door like they're trying to escape gunfire from up front?

Anonymous said...

#23) The 311 message specifically states that the Stop IDs are posted along Market and the Embarcadero. All center island stops on Market have Stop IDs.